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I’ve never met an advisor who didn’t want to be trusted by prospects and clients.
A 10-year study summarized in the Harvard Business Review found the primary trait impeding executives from reaching their goals was the inability to forge and maintain trusting relationships.
I have done extensive research on this subject. What I’ve found is the single biggest barrier to establishing trust in a new relationship is the lack of reciprocity. Almost every day in my coaching practice, I see advisors sending this message: They don’t trust the prospect.
Here are some examples of this counter-productive conduct.
Extensive screening
You don’t want to waste time at a meeting with someone who isn’t suitable for your practice. That’s understandable.
In a brief call (which should be with an advisor and not an assistant who has been delegated this task), you should be able to determine whether a meeting has the potential to be mutually beneficial.
When you engage in more extensive screening – often to determine which advisor at your firm might be a good fit, or to obtain more detailed financial information – what message are you sending?
The first message is that the prospect hasn’t gone to your website and doesn’t understand your preferred demographic and any minimum assets you require. If that information isn’t on your website, it should be.
A request for detailed financial information before you meet isn’t just off-putting, it also conveys a lack of trust. Why don’t you trust prospects to provide this information at a time of their choosing?
Setting the agenda
Many advisors structure the initial meeting around an agenda they set, in the order they choose. They believe this behavior is justified because they know what should be discussed at the meeting, since they are the “expert.”
This conduct raises a number of issues.
It assumes the same information is relevant to every prospect. It also conveys a lack of trust in the ability of the prospect to ask questions in an order that makes sense to them.
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How to Relate to Anyone
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Recently, a coaching client told me this story. He met with a couple in their mid-forties. He spent the first 50 minutes of the meeting going over his agenda, which included his expertise and how he works with clients.
As the hour was coming to a close, he asked the couple if they had any questions. The wife hesitatingly stated: Yes. We have a special needs child and were wondering if you had any experience setting up a special needs trust. Do you have time to discuss that issue?
If he had trusted them to set the agenda, this issue would have been front and center, where it belonged. Instead, he sent dual negative messages of insensitivity and lack of trust.
He didn’t convert the prospect.
A wrong-headed approach to trust
Advisors are keen to learn how to earn the trust of prospects and clients. Yet, I’ve never met anyone who asked me this question: How do I show I trust them?
When you change your approach to demonstrate trust in the person in front of you, you’ll quickly find the best way to earn trust is to give it.
For more information about marketing and branding opportunities with Dan’s upcoming book, Ask: How to Relate to Anyone, click here.
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