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If you’re a fan of true crime, you may remember hearing about Netflix’s “Unknown Number: The High School Catfish.” If you haven’t seen the documentary, beware — spoilers ahead.
The documentary, which made headlines over the summer, focuses on a Michigan high schooler who begins receiving threatening and explicit text messages from an unknown number. It’s later revealed that the culprit was the victim’s mother, Kendra Licardi.
Aside from the shocking revelation of who was behind all of this, the documentary alludes to the fact that Licardi was able to ‘catfish’ her child due to her financial role in the family. Licardi was the breadwinner of the family. In the documentary, she claims she worked at Central Michigan University in Human Resources before accepting a job in 2019 at Ferris State University, working in IT.
According to an investigation published in The Cut, at one point, Licardi told her husband she had gotten a big raise at her new job, leading the family to buy their dream home. Soon enough, the family begins missing mortgage payments. According to the investigation, her husband asserts the family experienced identity theft. Licardi says she was hacked after bouncing a check.
It’s later revealed that Licardi had been lying all along. She was actually fired from her job at CMU in 2019 and her new job at Ferris State didn’t come with a salary increase. In 2021, she was placed on a performance improvement plan and eventually quit. Since she presumably wasn’t working and had a background in IT, Licardi had all the time and knowledge to orchestrate the crime. It went on for about two years before she was caught.
By the time her lies were discovered, the family had been through financial hardship. Licardi was arrested and lost custody of her child. She also lost her marriage. When questioned about her motives, she reportedly told authorities that ‘stress and finances’ caused her to act out.
A Story of Financial Infidelity
In addition to shedding light on the dangers of technology and the damaging effects of cyber-bullying, this documentary also sheds light on the dangers of financial infidelity.
While this is an extreme case, not being involved in your finances is a risky game to play. As an advisor, I frequently see situations where one spouse was in charge of all the finances, and once they pass, the surviving spouse was completely left in the dark, unsure of what to do next. It can be even worse if it was an unexpected death and an estate plan wasn’t put in place. Aside from dealing with a costly probate process, unexpected tax ramifications can be a huge burden that can chip away at savings, or force the widow to find additional streams of income.
As an advisor, I also have come across cases of “financial secrecy” in which one partner hasn’t been forthcoming about their financial history. For example, I had a case involving a newlywed couple. As I was counseling them, it was revealed that the husband hadn’t filed a tax return for several years and the wife had no prior knowledge of this. Instead of planning for their future, the couple had to figure out how to deal with this and how to establish trust and transparency moving forward.
Financial infidelity can severely damage or even diminish relationships and current family dynamics. Some red flags that could indicate financial infidelity are:
1. Secrecy around finances. Your partner becomes defensive or evasive when you ask about money, changes passwords or removes joint access from bank accounts, or hides communications from financial institutions.
2. Unexplained/hidden expenses. You begin noticing unfamiliar charges on shared credit cards or bank statements; there are frequent ATM withdrawals or cash back transactions with no explanation; or purchases and assets may appear that are outside of your shared budget.
3. Secret accounts or lines of credit. Your partner's spending habits may have changed abruptly, likely without any discussion. You might notice cash is withdrawn frequently even when bills are paid electronically. Your partner may even insist on handling the finances alone.
4. Missing or incomplete financial information. You may notice bank statements or receipts are disappearing, and tax returns or financial documents may be withheld or filed separately. Your partner might even minimize or misreport debts, income, or assets during joint planning, similarly to the Licardi case.
While this documentary showcases an extreme consequence of financial secrecy, financial infidelity in any situation can lead to serious ramifications not only for your partner, but for you as well. Before opening joint bank accounts, moving in together, or marriage, be sure to talk about finances with your significant other and seek the help of a financial advisor, if necessary.
If you’re an advisor, encourage your clients to discuss prior debts, spending habits, income levels and future goals with their partners to ensure everyone is on the same page before making a life-altering commitment. Addressing these issues as soon as possible can prevent a lot of hardship down the line.
John Jones, a financial advisor at Heritage Financial, has been working successfully in the financial world for almost a decade. He has a broad and specialized knowledge in securities, financial planning, wealth management, taxes and more.
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Advisor Perspectives welcomes guest contributions. The views presented here do not necessarily represent those of Advisor Perspectives.
